You probably don't have to be the child of a soldier to understand what it's like when they come home. But in case you want to see complete joy, check out this link 'Nathan posted to my Facebook wall with videos of dog and service member reunions. Beautiful and perfect for Veterans Day.

It's not fun when you snip the end of your finger with your scissors. And I wasn't even running with them!

In honor of Veterans Day, all you have to do is comment with a page number between 1 and 611, and another number between 1 and 25, and my fingers will march through the pages of one of these books to find you some happiness.

Well, except for that ONE finger.

Thank you to all those who've served.

This photo made me oddly happy when I saw it:

Picture from Yoko Ono's web site

John Lennon's widow Yoko Ono; George Harrison's widow Olivia Harrison; Stella McCartney, daughter of Beatle Paul McCartney and the late Linda Eastman McCartney; and Barbara Bach Starkey,
the wife of Ringo Starr

Last night in New York, the three Beatle wives presented designer Stella McCartney an award as one of Glamour magazine's Women of the Year 2009 for her fashion label and her commitment to animal rights.

Tom and I have been gradually giving The Compound's main residence a thorough cleaning over the past two or three weeks. I knew Greg was coming for his signing this past weekend, and my sister was hoping to visit Bobo Butterbean with her dog Harley at Thanksgiving. I wanted everything to be in order before their arrivals.

I THOUGHT I'd taken care of all the dust. But then Tim's boss dropped by to do an inspection, and you can see by her expression that I missed a spot. The Big H is so relentless about these things.

On the most recent episode of Lifetime's Project Runway, the designers were taken to the Getty Center in Los Angeles. They were given a tour of the J. Paul Getty Museum as well as the center's grounds. The designers were then asked to create a look inspired by any part of the center, including paintings, sculpture, and furniture from the museum's collections, architectural features of the building, or the center's breathtaking views.

As much as I wanted to jet to Los Angeles and go to the Getty Museum (which opened since my last trip to California, or Jim would have taken me there), I could only look at its collections online. I'd almost decided to work from one of my favorite paintings by Raphael when I saw this wonderful mid-1720s pastel from Italian artist Rosalba Carriera.

A Muse
Pastel on blue paper

From the Getty web site: Famous throughout Europe for her portraits and teste di fantasia (fanciful renderings of beautiful women in allegorical or mythological guise), Rosalba Carriera made the pastel, above, at the ducal court in Modena, Italy.

I'm always talking about my muses, and Carriera's painting provided another one. I was inspired by the leaves in the woman's hair, the ethereal fabric of her bodice, and the colors. I wanted to create a very feminine portrayal of nature's beauty. Did I succeed?

( Please click here to see. )

I haven't been taking enough photos lately.

Today is Scout's Honor Pet Adoption Event in the Heights, so Pixie is on an outing. If you're in Houston, go by and see all their wonderful animals available for adoption. This is a great photo Lindsey took of Pixie sleeping on top of her BFF, Sugar. These two have such a fantastic time playing together. Lindsey hopes that Pixie's forever family will want to set up play dates for the two of them.

Going to your local brick-and-mortar store would be a great way to celebrate National Bookstore Day. Remember to be kind to your booksellers, who provide the best links between you, writers, and the nourishment of your imagination.

It's a good day to post a photo of your favorite local bookstore or tell a story about why it's special to you. My favorite Houston independent bookseller, Murder By the Book, will be hosting Greg Herren's signing for Murder in the Garden District at 4:30 today. That's where The Compounders and The Brides will be. Join us!

Current Photo Friday theme: Softness

Back in the 1990s, my friend Big Hair Lisa and I went into a grocery store late one night. It must have been near Valentine's Day, because all these red bears were posed among the flowers in their floral department. I picked up this one and fell in love with him because he was the softest thing I'd ever held. Lisa took him away from me, paid for him, and gave him back.

Recently on a daytime drama I watch, a couple exchanging wedding vows promised to be each other's "soft place when you fall." Lisa, like me, is a steel magnolia. But many times when I've fallen, she's provided that soft place of friendship and unconditional love.

A soft heart is the most beautiful place I know.

A little more than three years ago, I went to my first Jewish wedding. Although it was fascinating to see rituals I’d never seen, hear prayers I’d never heard, and experience new concepts such as the chuppah, the ketubah, the breaking of the glass, and the yichud room, the best part was that it was one of those weddings. The kind where, as a guest, you can see that this is a marriage of two people who truly love each other in a way that promises a lifelong relationship. The rabbi had known the bride since she was a little girl, and he’d understood the first time he met her beloved that this was “the one.” Their parents looked on with utter joy and pride during the ceremony. Afterward, families and friends mingled. People met for the first time, or got reacquainted, over the meal at the reception. There was dancing. Storytelling. Raucous laughter. Quiet moments when everyone felt bathed in the happiness of the couple and all those who loved them. It was magic, that night in 2006, and I left the reception with renewed appreciation for the way romantic love helps the rest of us feel a little more hope, a little more charity, a little more faith.

Love builds us as a community. One manifestation was how, the next day, while the couple was flying to Jamaica for their honeymoon, their wedding planner decided to take all the beautiful flowers from the reception tables and distribute them among patients at a local hospice—a beautiful and compassionate gesture that brightened the day for the hospice staff, as well. Thus the love celebrated at one intimate ceremony spilled over into a larger world, touching the lives of even strangers. That’s the great gift that is love, and when we receive it, it’s as if the entire universe pauses for a moment to bask in it.

I often draw on my memories of that wedding weekend and the hope and comfort they give me about our capacity to love. I needed that hope and comfort so much a few weeks ago when I read a story about another couple that broke my heart. I didn’t know them, but they easily could have been neighbors or friends of mine. They were the parents of three adopted children, and in 2007, the entire family was about to depart for a cruise from Miami when the mother fell ill. She was rushed to a hospital, where she was admitted.

This is when the real nightmare began.

The hospital refused to take medical information from the woman’s partner because the partner was also female. According to a hospital spokesperson, they were in “an antigay city and state,” and the woman’s partner and children would receive no information about the patient’s medical condition, nor would they be allowed to see her. The partner managed to contact people in their home state who were able to fax all the legal documentation that unmarried couples put in place to protect them from just such an ordeal—including the medical power of attorney.

A medical power of attorney is a document that will allow any person so designated by the patient legal rights regarding medical decisions, but it was not honored by this Miami hospital. As the patient slipped into a coma and eventually died, her partner was allowed only a five-minute visit while a priest was present to administer the sacrament of anointing of the sick.

The patient’s doctor admitted there was no reason why her family shouldn’t see the dying woman. No reason except the cruelest kind of bigotry. Even after her death, when the family returned home, the county refused to release the death certificate to her partner because they weren’t married.

I’ve been present at the deaths of five people I loved. Those hours, even minutes, before and when someone dies are profound. The words, the touches, the gestures we use to comfort and express our love as we say goodbye are sacred. I can’t imagine being in a situation in which my husband would be only a few feet from me, his life slipping away, and being forbidden to be at his side. Even thinking of that makes me cry. But it wouldn’t happen. If it were physically possible for me to be with him, no doctor, nurse, social worker, or hospital administrator would block my way. Nor was I, as a daughter, kept away from my parents during their hospitalizations, and I was with my mother when she died. Custom, the law, the very essence of human kindness protect me from the agony of being kept from a family member who’s dying.

But custom, the law, and human kindness didn’t protect those two women in Miami. And my friends, the Jewish couple? They wouldn’t have been protected either, had they ended up at that Miami hospital before taking their honeymoon trip to Jamaica. Because though their families and friends witnessed their wedding ceremony, and though their rabbi blessed their union, they also are both women. There is no civil law that honors their commitment to each other.

So please don’t tell me that the bigotry that overturns or denies protections and equal rights to gays and lesbians in places like California and Maine doesn’t affect me. It does. And please don’t tell me how you really do love your gay friends, but you think that “marriage is between one man and one woman,” because as far as I’m concerned, that isn’t love. I’ve never yet been told of one single incident in which a minister or priest or pastor was forced to marry any couple that he or she didn’t feel comfortable marrying. This isn’t about religion. This is about civil law, and treating all people with equality and dignity.

When you tell me that my gay and lesbian friends and family members don’t deserve to be married, don’t deserve to be part of decisions regarding their spouses’ medical care, don’t deserve to stand by their spouses’ hospital beds as they’re dying to say that last goodbye, don’t deserve to live full lives without fear of being denied the most basic respect and rights a marriage bestows, then you’re saying the power of love to build and sustain us as individuals, families, and communities doesn’t deserve to exist.

And you are wrong.

Please comment with a page number between 1 and 611, and another number between 1 and 25, and Madam will find something in this book to make you happier than a pig in mud.